Monday, November 15, 2010

Welcome to Facespace!!!!!!

There was a day, during my socially awkward larval stage, where the idea of being able to be social without being seen would've appealed to me. The possibility of asking Susie to the Steven Hawkings Dance without actually having to witness her adjusting her bangs in my reflective face grease as I stumbled through what had to be the worst sales pitch ever would've brought a sigh of relief. Alas, I grew up in a world where hands on was not always followed by the words restraining order. Now the rules have completely changed and, for all the good technology has done, it has taken away some things I was looking forward to. One such thing: the end of high school.
On my last day of my last year of the banal parade known as Public Education there was one thing I was absolutely certain of. Without a doubt I knew that, unless I decided to go to the reunion, I was never going to have to see these assholes again..EVER! No more listening to their "big talk" (a sickness generally stemming from wrongfully inflated egos) or having to hear about all their great luck that they took for granted. My last year of high school was a minefield comprised of my parents divorce and my "peers" talking about what wonderful college their parents were paying for so as I walked down to get my diploma, which marked an end to their reign, I smiled knowing that I would never have to suffer another minute with these over rated fuckwads. For years it went that way too...none of them existed anymore and it was as if god personally apologized to me for the lack of quality control back in 1978. All was right with the world. Then came social networking. Myspace, Facebook, Mybook, Facespace... Friends encouraged me to sign up so we could keep in touch after college. After what seemed like hours of pestering I reluctantly signed up. For a short time, sans the occasional spam e-mail, all was quiet on this front as well. Then, when the popularity increased, I began to get "friend requests" from people...who, in the real world, were never my friend. I changed to the competitor site in order to go somewhere under the radar. Soon they popped up there as well. Foolishly I thought to myself "Well, maybe they have grown up like me and changed...maybe it'll be different this time around. We're adults now, after all." So common sense takes a back seat to the desperate need for the glass to be half full and I begin to except friend requests. After a few weeks I realize things are not in fact like they used to be at all. In fact, they've gotten a hell of a lot worse. Now it's not just "Look at me! Look at me!" it's "Look at me! ...and my kids... and my car... and my promotion ..and my new house .. and my ...." Suddenly, my computer screen is my own personal virtual hell consisting of "feeds" describing in great painstaking detail the complete downfall of Western civilization. Now it's not a complete wash, there are good things that came with social networking. I got to keep in touch with family that were far away as well as friends over seas. All that becomes overshadowed when having to read "Can't wait...another four day weekend" followed by "NEW CAR!" followed by "OMG preggers..again!" followed by "If you feel the need to cram your beliefs down someone else's throat repost this" which leads me to my next point... People can ruin anything and social networking sites bring it to a whole new level. Take for example Atheism. I used to understand it. Now it's being crammed down my throat every other post by people trying to convince others (usually known as the Right Wing Zealots) they are right, that God doesn't exist. Honestly, now it just seems like another form of a religion. A group of people trying to make me think that they have the answer. Then there's the e-mails. Someone you haven't seen in ten years finds you. You e-mail them and ask how they are doing. They respond saying it's "been too long...need to hang out" You respond with "Let's get a cup of coffee" after which they never respond or send a response along the lines of "Well...we're talking on here" Really? How lazy can you be? Then again how foolish can I be? I thought people from high school would've changed as they got older but I guess not and I'm the same as well. I still loath and hate selfish stupidity. They still are acting selfish and stupid only now some of them have ugly, ugly babies.